10 minute write

I have developed a moring meditatin ritual that is working for me for the first time in my life

Yesterday, I created a mediation playlist which includes Tibetan Monks, Brian Eno's Ambient music and a variety of other artists I found in my search.  the list is now 7 and a half hours long. I could meditate all day and be covered.

I have placed my aromatherapy dispenser in a corner of the living room and each morning I fill it with a new scent, before I sit.

I light a tea light in my Himalayan Salt candle holder and ignite a stick of Paulo Santo that I brought back with me from Ecuador.

All of these steps help prepare me to sit. And I appreciate the incorporation of all of the senses. It feels loving and delicious and supportive.

Lately, I have been waking up with energy. It has been so long since that has happened, I don't remember. Maybe since before I got "covid" last year. So, well over a year. I am enjoying it so much. And it is such a relief to know that it is possible to feel this way again. Energized in the morning. When I wake. energized when I wake. What a blessing and waht a relief.

Yesterday was shaping up to be a quiet day of solitude and reading. Instead, it shaped up into taking on the Austrian citizenship application.  I realized my passport is going to expire in two months and I need to time this out while my passport is still valid. I'm finally ready to engage an apostille.  Who I call and who comes to me. I also amassed a pile of documents that follow my father's life from birth to death, including his arrival in London as a 13-year-old, the years he spent in Great Britain, his marriage certificate to my mother - both civil and Jewish, record of his name change from Rottblatt to Jordan, his latest passport and his death certificate. It's a 17 page stack of official and unofficial documentation of my father's 95 year long life. It's heavy and weighs on me and when I think about it, my throat tightens and my airways become constricted. So much strife. So much heaviness.